In today's society it almost seems "wrong" when someone says that they are single. Pair that with being almost 28, done with college, and having almost all your friends be engaged / married.. and well you're asking to have a million questions come your way.
Why aren't you dating someone?
How come you and _______ didn't work out?
Don't you hate being single?
Do you think you're too picky?
Trust me if you're in the same situation as I am you have been asked one of those questions at least once or perhaps a million times. While I have never been one to be "upset" over being single, I have been someone who used to wonder why everyone else seemed to find Mr. Right. For me, I would rather hold my standards high than settle on someone just to fit "the norm". However, it also wasn't until I really spent some time working on myself that I realized just how important / okay being single really is.
In my opinion too many people validate their happiness on the basis of being with someone else. In reality, your happiness should come from within not who you are with. With being single over the last year, I have learned that not dating someone has been the best thing for me.
Here are a few of my biggest reasons why being single is great for you / why you should embrace being single:
You get to find out who you really are
Decide what you want to do with your life
After a break up, you have time to evaluate what you truly want / don't want
There's time to work on your self love / self worth
Less reasons to shave your legs LOL (semi kidding semi truthful)
You make your own rules
Embrace being able to be confident in yourself again
Free time to pick up a new hobby
Become comfortable being alone
Over the last year, I can honestly I have not been happier. By choosing to end my last relationship / focus on me, I have found myself again. (I am sure I am not the only one to feel this way). The truth is, while no one is dead set on forever being alone just because you're not rocking a ring / starting the hashtags to your destination wedding doesn't mean there is something wrong with you.
The best thing you can do while being single is to really use that time to be "selfish". Create a list of non negotiations, your ideal partner, and what you want out of life. My best advice too, don't settle. You're not picky, you have standards. You shouldn't feel like you have to change your standards in order to find someone. What you should be doing is confidently deciding who you want to attract, and letting that person stand with you not make you whole. In all honesty being in the wrong relationship can be toxic to your health, while being single can actually be the best thing for it.
Therefore the next time you're not thrilled on spending Valentine's Day or holidays alone, remind yourself of how strong you are going to be in your next relationship from working on yourself now.
-Taryn
Coaching: Transformwithtaryn.com
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